No. No. No no no no no.

Listen, I'm not one to rush decisions. I like to take my time with them. Kick them around a little bit. Like a baby. I mean, not like a baby, what is something you kick? No, I was right, a baby. Anyways, another thing I don't rush to is conclusions. And I especially try to hold out my conclusions about a team's draft, because it's going to take about three years for the players of said draft to come to fruition, unless they're in the top tier (and sometimes not even then).

But the Bulls fucking blew the draft last night. I missed all of the first 10 picks, except I did manage to see 2 seconds of them. Those two seconds? Joakim Noah wearing a fucking Bulls hat. Waste of a pick. Wait, I'll take that back.

Listen, I don't think Joakim Noah is a shitty player. He's just not what the Bulls need. No, I'll take that back too. I think he could be something the Bulls need, but it may take a little time. One thing he will never be, though, is a scorer. And that is one thing I hoped the Bulls could get with their #9 pick. Ok, I get it, there was none available for them to take. But what about shopping the pick? To the 76ers? Someone must have wanted Noah badly enough? Maybe? Did we really?

Here's what I expect from Noah. We need a young, athletic guy who can rebound and mix it up. I'd prefer he could also mix it up on the offensive end. But mixing it up in general is something I'll always get behind. We also have Nocioni, an undersized player who we don't really have the money (or desire) to keep. So Noah replaces Nocioni's role on the team of being the energy guy off the bench, but he provides better low-post defense and much better rebounding. We lose the offense of Nocioni, but then again, his +/- sucked at the end of the year anyways. Also, I think it will be interesting to see the pairing of Noah and Thomas down low. Not much offense (depending what Ty can add in the offseason) but high energy and tenacious defense. So, I guess I'm not as angry with this pick as I was at first. But just a note to Joakim Noah. Cut your hair, and don't be a fucking jackass. And please God shave. Thanks.

Now, on to the rest of the draft, or as I will call it, Shit Central.

Aaron Cook. I've seen this kind of player before. His name is every fucking other white center in the NBA who's failed in the past 20 years. Aaron Cook was constantly lauded for being such a great college center. And yet, his team has never won, and he always disappears in big games. And, two years ago his draft status wsa probably as high as it was going to be. There hasn't been any more improvement. He is a waste. Worthless. The Bulls should have drafted me. Because I also will never put on a uniform in the NBA. And I would not do it for less money. Aaron Cook. What a shite pick. Is Nick Smith unavailable that we needed to draft Aaron Cook?

And who's next? JamesOn Curry. First, what the hell is a JamesOn? There's probably some punchline to that joke, but I surely don't know it. Anyways, JamesOn went from being one of the top freshmen in the country to 3rd team All Conference last year. I didn't even know the Big 12 made a 3rd team. He's got no handle, no defense, and really his only skill is shooting the set shot, which he's not super awesome at either. Also, he's an undersized 2. Hmm, where else have I seen a team with an undersized 2. Shit, I just don't know. I'm glad we've got one though.

I get it, the end of the draft is a total crapshoot anyways and you're most likely never going to see anything from any of the players there. You're also going to take the best players available. And I don't really know what else was available. But I would much rather take a chance on a kid out of a small school (whatever happened to Harold "The Show" Arcineaux? Was that even his name?) than some player who I've seen a thousand times before and who used to (maybe once, on a fast break or something) impress me.

Also, John Paxson is a genius. Let's not discount that. I could be totally wrong, and it would be totally valid because John Paxson is bigger than Jesus. Well, I don't mean to say that he's bigger than Jesus, just a bigger deal. I would say Jesus was probably about 6'4".

So I could be totally wrong. And I would be fine with that. In fact, I suspect that I could be. While I don't like the Noah pick at first glance, it's actually pretty solid when you consider how easily he should be able to slide into his role. And really one pick is all you're going to get out of most drafts, so I'm guessing that Pax has a few ideas up his sleeve. If only we could rape the Knicks of a ton of draft picks again. Have they heard about the high ceiling on Ben Gordon?