I don't want to be old
I would like to post a link to this story and recommend that everyone read it. Because it makes me sad. Not sad for the future of this country, like MTV (oh man, I caught about two minutes of that stupid show 24/7 (I refuse to spell that shit out) and I almost had a seizure at the rapid decrease of brain cells from me punching myself in the brain), or pretty much any other story involing young people or dudes in pink shirts.
But I am very worried about becoming old.
Also, I never want to hear a mechanic say this: "I use the Internet for things like buying car parts, reading celebrity gossip." That's great. Do you think he also uses it to buy dolls for he secret collection so he doesn't have to go do it at the stores? Come on, what kind of mechanic reads celebrity gossip? Is it really that important to know who Elisha Cuthbert is dating when you're changing the oil on a 72 Charger?
Or there is this nugget, from some older lady who uses instant messaging after seeing her kids do it: "'I do it more now," she said, boasting: "Sometimes I do two conversations at once.'" Wow, two at once. I would think it would be much harder for an old person to talk through instant messaging, because most of your peers are technology-retarded. But two whole conversations at once! Someone give her the Noble Prize for genius!
I really hope I am never that out of touch with technology. Which is why whenever someone asks me if I knew about a new invention that has come out, I make sure to say "Oh, I heard about that months ago, but I thought they had delayed release due to some manufacturing micalculations." See? I sound like I've got my finger on the pulse of technology.
I don't try to understand the series of tubes that connects one computer to another, allowing for the transfer of email that is hopefully delivered in the correct tube. Apparently, this 'interweb' is also used for email, whatever that means. I just know that if I at least sound like I know what I'm talking about, people won't think I'm senile. Until, of course, I become senile, which I foresee happening probably around 38.
But I am very worried about becoming old.
Also, I never want to hear a mechanic say this: "I use the Internet for things like buying car parts, reading celebrity gossip." That's great. Do you think he also uses it to buy dolls for he secret collection so he doesn't have to go do it at the stores? Come on, what kind of mechanic reads celebrity gossip? Is it really that important to know who Elisha Cuthbert is dating when you're changing the oil on a 72 Charger?
Or there is this nugget, from some older lady who uses instant messaging after seeing her kids do it: "'I do it more now," she said, boasting: "Sometimes I do two conversations at once.'" Wow, two at once. I would think it would be much harder for an old person to talk through instant messaging, because most of your peers are technology-retarded. But two whole conversations at once! Someone give her the Noble Prize for genius!
I really hope I am never that out of touch with technology. Which is why whenever someone asks me if I knew about a new invention that has come out, I make sure to say "Oh, I heard about that months ago, but I thought they had delayed release due to some manufacturing micalculations." See? I sound like I've got my finger on the pulse of technology.
I don't try to understand the series of tubes that connects one computer to another, allowing for the transfer of email that is hopefully delivered in the correct tube. Apparently, this 'interweb' is also used for email, whatever that means. I just know that if I at least sound like I know what I'm talking about, people won't think I'm senile. Until, of course, I become senile, which I foresee happening probably around 38.
posted by Jtrouble at 10:02 AM
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