Going on the Real World is probably a mistake

Unless you really really need to look like a complete jackass on national television, you have no family or friends who would be embarassed by your actions, and you enjoy letting everyone know how much of whore you'll be to be put on television. Then it's probably a good idea.

Last night I had the severe misfortune of watching The Real World on Satan's Channel. Of course, once I got stuck on that channel, I couldn't do anything to free myself from its grip. It had a stranglehold on me.

So this season on the show there's some loser chick who went to Tulane and supposedly represents everything about New Orleans. But she's originally from Jersey. Then there's the gay dude who is way too pretty to be straight, but at first people thought he was in fact straight. Then you've got the massive toolbag who is 21 and apparently the girls love. Then some kind of weird girl, and then a former Raiderette. And this season instead of one token black guy, there are two.

Already I am ashamed that I know so much of the show. But it's a real trainwreck, and I don't know if I'm offended or honored to have been able to witness last night's installment.

So I guess on the first episode, the Toolbag made out with the Jerseygirl, and she said something girly about feeling a connection or something. Then, on his way to go continue making out or something, he got sidetracked and started messing around with Raiderette. And Jerseygirl found out.

Last night, Jerseygirl was on a quest to find a random dude to fool around with to make Toolbag jealous. And did she ever find another complete jackass. It was at this point that you know that no one in the house is really friends at all, because if they were close friends, one of the girls would have stepped in and prevented her from making a huge mistake. On cable.

So anyways, Toolbag got jealous or something. And I think he and Jerseygirl ended up making out that night. And talking about some sort of connection or something stupid like that. I wasn't really listening to their drivel. I feel like had I actually been trying to, I would have pulled out all of my hair due to their drunken, retarded logic.

At some point they just said that they didn't want to make each other jealous. So Jerseygirl and Toolbag made a pact to not hook up with anyone for 24 hours. Now even when I have my most will power I am unable to not hoook up with anyone for anything over 2, maybe 3 minutes. So for these two to make such a sacrifice speaks volumes about their relationship with each other.

Cut to the next day. Toolbag comes downstairs and Jerseygirl is sitting at the computer or something. Well, he asks her if they talked about something serious last night. She said yeah, and he said, oh. He doesn't remember it.

Now, I've known drunk girls who have lied better about not remembering a conversation than this bastard. It was such a cop-out. And he obviously feels very uncomfortable with his ability to go without hooking up with someone for 24 hours. With probably 6 hours down. If not more. So then he complains of 'not feeling right' and heads back to bed.

So obviously these two have quite the rapport.

When I was in school (towards graduation) I thought it would be really cool to go on Real World. But, seeing the giant idiocy of the people on this cast, especially Toolbag and Jerseygirl, makes me so glad that I never even made any sort of attempt to try to be put on the show.

This show really does nothing but increase my hatred of MTV and people in general. Especially people who are delusional about how quickly they can form bonds, and about how making out is fun and no one ever gets hurt. I usually just hope that when making out does backfire, it happens in the most humiliating way possible. In addition to happening on MTV.